I have spent a countless number of
hours in our yard and it is not even near caught up. [Hmm… Caught up?
Interesting choice of words.] Living rurally on a farmyard that I once was blindly
devoted to, has its challenges and as I sit here at my desk with the timer on
so that I only write for a wee bit, I am overwhelmed. May is an overwhelming
month for me with our children’s spring and summer pursuits playing out, my
desire to run and golf and this never ending yard work, not to mention the
usual duties that subsist. There have been years where I have contemplated not
putting a garden in and yet by July know that I would be sad not to have one.
As I wonder why it is important to me to have everything looking perfect, I
turn to the words of Byron Katie and am grateful for this distress. “When you
realize that suffering and discomfort are the call to inquiry, you may actually
begin to look forward to uncomfortable feelings.” Knowing that “happiness is a
clear mind”, I am happy that I have taken time to just sit and write and with
these musings, I have begun to smile warmly, breathe easier and will take my
awaiting teens over to our neighbourhood greenhouse to pick out flowers for our
yard, as well as book a tee time for all of us, later this afternoon. This is
the perfection that I really desire.
~ Ellyn
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