On Cultivating Love...

I know that love is what I am but in this human being that I reside, it has come to mean a form of art that needs to be honoured, pondered over, revered and cultivated.

Thank you to Kathryn Woodward Thomas for opening up an array of many to assist others, and me, in 171 countries around this small world of ours, to nurture and improve upon this Art of Love.

Over the years, and generally speaking, the nature of relationships have changed. There was a time when people married for money, social status, safety, security and procreation. They wanted a person to fit a role. Now, more and more people desire a deep, meaningful soul-to-soul bond with their partner in life.

When I met my husband it felt like a dream had come true. I know now that it was and is just that. This April, we will have been married for 20 years, and like many relationships, there have been ups and downs. There was a time when we fell into a hole. Yesterday’s words, from Arielle Ford through The Art of Love seminar, touched me deeply when she said that if in a relationship, you experience a dream and then a nightmare, and there of course is no abuse involved, you are probably with the right person. A breakdown is a gift and that is why I prefer to call it as Brené Brown suggests, an unravelling. Our unravelling allowed us the opportunity to make our GOOD relationship, GREAT! But it doesn’t just stop there, we have to continue to cherish and develop it.

It has not been all easy, but as for my beloved, and me, we created an awareness of love, slowly and deliberately inviting supportive people to surround us. The podcast seminar that I referred to is just one more guide so that we may align our love with its highest purpose.

Thank you.

We too are committed...

~ Ellyn

I Say Stuff...

I grew up in a household that was cautious around my maternal grandmother. She was a domineering force who poked and prodded and we had to be careful not to say certain things in front of her for fear of her going into a tirade and causing my mom even more grief than she already did.

When you are taught to omit details in order to keep peace, and I know that peace is truly what a being wants, you simply learn to omit details in order to keep peace. I wasn’t very good at this because… well… I say stuff.

As a child, I would emote and blurt out whenever the impetus to do so arose. When grandma was about and I opened my mouth, I remember watching my mother grit her teeth and hold her breath while my brother just frowned at me. This doesn’t mean that I would use curse words, or say something disrespectful, it was more like, “Hey mom, remember when I was trying on grandma’s glasses and you said it scared you? ” Or “We don’t like the television shows that you watch, grandma.” Sounds pretty harmless, and yet I remember the kind of wrath that followed these statements.

If the intent is honourable and not filled with malice, being open and saying what one wants to say, is healthy and makes for much richer relationships, and it was something I had to relearn after years of trying to stifle what I wasn’t supposed to say.

Now, I say stuff.

~ Ellyn